she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
Randomize
