Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize
