oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
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