People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
The following message is brought to you by IMSOFUCKINGSORRY. Dude I'm really sorry I got you arrested last night. You are allowed to choose a repayment plan from the following options: Money, weed, or a single kick to the balls any time within the next calender months. Repayment outside of the aforementioned options can be negotiated and considered within reason.
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
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