Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
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