Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
