is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
come over after work tomorrow, liz and i will make all of your wildest dreams come true. so long as your wildest dreams involve drinking champagne at my house with two girls who won't have sex with you.
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
Randomize
