question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
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