Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
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