I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
We were destined to go to rehab together
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
Randomize
