STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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