Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
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