I'm really into asian looking animals
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
Randomize