Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
You were upset that she was flirting with your boyfriend so I thought the best game plan was to show her my boobs and get her to make out with me instead. I am the greatest friend on absinthe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
I just want somebody who'll randomly bring me pizza and lovingly squeeze my butt. Is there a dating app for that, do you think?
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
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