I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
So I went home with some chick last night... I'm not sue what's worse: not getting a nut at 5am, the condom breaking and not being replaced, feeling poo when I put my finger in her but, sleeping on a heroin mattress in her living room, her swine flu coughing fit at 7am or realizing she peed the matt at 10am. Actually it was probably the fact that she continuously told me she was the classiest girl in boulder.
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
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