the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
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