my phone is set on vibrate and its tucked up in my left front pocket. call me back 20 times real quick.
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
Randomize
