We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
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