Pregnant stripper...not hot.
What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
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