i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
Drunk is not a location!
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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