I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
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