good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
Dude. I'm no longer allowed to use my sword when drinking. I just spent 20 min cleaning up popcorn. I stabbed Moe in the leg and chopped his door knob off
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
Randomize