Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
Randomize
