the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
Randomize
