Where is the hickey?
Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
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