the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
Accidentally typed message to mom that included word "kink." FML. Played it off as autocorrect from "drink" which was somehow more acceptable
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
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