My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
please come you make the beer taste better
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
Randomize
