Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
Randomize
