so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
I just totok an inventory of my purse: 1 apple, 1 pair of underwear, 7 condoms, $18 in ones, a check with "for sexual healing" in the subject line, and a 4 oz bottle of wine.
Oh! and a letter from a judge saying I got an interview. Cause that balances it out.
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
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