I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
You left me with no money to have random Chicago sex. The least you can do is pick me up an egg mcmuffin on your walk of shame back to the hotel.
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
Randomize
