They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
You sat on a wall pretending to be a gargoyle before shouting "batman!" and jumping at me
I'm the drunk Des Moines deserves, but not the one it needs
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
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