Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
So I "accidentally" brought my road beers into church for this wedding
And they fell out of my pocket on the pew. Made quite a noise...safe to say I'm batting a thousand
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
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