she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
Randomize
