I hate all girls vehemently.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
Randomize
