I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
Randomize
