i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
Randomize
