if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
Randomize
