I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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