Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
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