Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize