It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
Randomize
