Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Randomize
