Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
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