everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
My motherfucking vibrator ran out of batteries right when I was about to orgasm. It's like he's possessed everything sexual in my life and has compelled it to NOT SATISFY ME.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
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