I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
