we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
Randomize