are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
Randomize
