If the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse gang banged each other and had a kid, it would look like the creature I woke up next to this morning.
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
Randomize
