Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
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