Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
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