if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
I just woke up, dressed as Chris Brown, with a bunless hot dog (presumably from 7/11) in my pocket, wearing a pair of shoes I don't recognize as my own. Help.
Randomize
